[There's more he wants to say. Yet the difficulty of communication with his brother is magnified, somehow, but Sasuke's simple acceptance of his desire. There is no question - no real demand - for an explanation. Perhaps he shouldn't have expected it, and yet it makes Itachi keenly aware of what he has requested of his younger brother.
And what Sasuke has agreed to, blindly.
What was it Stiles said? "You're his big brother. You need to put in the extra effort to bridge that divide." It's a sharp, painful flag in his mind now.]
Sasuke. When we met previously, were you trying to Sync when you touched me?
Edited (changed for clarity) 2021-02-10 22:37 (UTC)
[ This is unexpected. More than the backhanded request for Stiles to be protected from harm.
He sits for what feels like a small eternity, just looking at the question. While the fact of their lack of Synchrony has sat like a knife in his ribs, he suspected that was simply how it would remain. His brother had spent the majority of their childhood holding him at arm's length — something Sasuke understands better these days — so he assumed this was just how things would be. Maybe Itachi wasn't even bothered by it from sheer habit.
Sasuke weighs the value of giving him a lie to relieve him of the burden, but decides against it. His brother may not remember what happened in that cave but it didn't change that Sasuke knew it. It makes him feel like he owes Itachi the truth. ]
I hadn't been thinking of it at the time.
I wanted
[ Just to touch him and know he was real. He changes tactics. No use rubbing salt in the wound. ]
You surprised me. Given previous dimensions… I've learned to block and control projected channels of communication, similar to the way Synchrony is done.
I was not prepared for it. My reaction to you was automatic and unintentional.
[Part habit, part uncertainty… is he really explaining himself well? It's so difficult; he feels like he's standing at the base of a sheer cliff, unready to climb.]
It wasn't your fault. And it does not mean that we are not compatible, but… it's possible there are still risks to us attempting to Sync. An emotional toll.
[Is Sasuke even aware of the all-encompassing, debilitating, paralzying effect he has on his older brother? No. Likely not. He's buried that piece of himself beneath a lifetime of guilt. He'd severed their relationship so long ago, expecting to never get it back.]
I would try it with you again, under more deliberate circumstances. If that is something you'd want.
[ The impact of what Itachi tells him is so large that Sasuke sets his phone, face down, on the island in the middle of his apartment and walks away from it.
It isn't lost on him that it had taken death, resurrection, and Sasuke's unbridled determination to get any kind of truth from his brother. Yet here, all it had taken was a text message. But more than the offer of Synchrony and all that comes with it are the words It wasn't your fault.
It takes him a good thirty minutes to reel himself back and return to the conversation. ]
I remember. You said the Bond was similar. Mastering that technique must have been easy for a shinobi of your caliber.
[The delay doesn't bother him. It allows Itachi a moment to gather his own thoughts, and reminds him too well of their attempts at stilted conversation in Aefenglom.
He doesn't want to acknowledge the compliment. It feels so wrong, and so misplaced, a matured pantomime of Sasuke as a child crowing over his brother's skill as a shinobi. And how does it compare now, suspecting Sasuke has likely surpassed his ability altogether? No, almost certainly he has. His own physical condition here would see to that difference now.]
It wasn't so simple as that.
In any case… I am grateful for your willingness to attempt it again.
[That's all he can think to say, an appreciation for Sasuke's confidence like a bright, blazing beacon in the dark.
[ Simplicity doesn't matter; to Sasuke it only drives home the fact Itachi was able to master something difficult. That isn't the point, he knows, and besides — being faced with both his brother's honesty and gratitude is overwhelming. Leaving the conversation as it is feels wrong somehow, but Sasuke finds he can't continue for the time being. So: ]
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no subject
And what Sasuke has agreed to, blindly.
What was it Stiles said? "You're his big brother. You need to put in the extra effort to bridge that divide." It's a sharp, painful flag in his mind now.]
Sasuke. When we met previously, were you trying to Sync when you touched me?
no subject
He sits for what feels like a small eternity, just looking at the question. While the fact of their lack of Synchrony has sat like a knife in his ribs, he suspected that was simply how it would remain. His brother had spent the majority of their childhood holding him at arm's length — something Sasuke understands better these days — so he assumed this was just how things would be. Maybe Itachi wasn't even bothered by it from sheer habit.
Sasuke weighs the value of giving him a lie to relieve him of the burden, but decides against it. His brother may not remember what happened in that cave but it didn't change that Sasuke knew it. It makes him feel like he owes Itachi the truth. ]
I hadn't been thinking of it at the time.
I wanted
[ Just to touch him and know he was real. He changes tactics. No use rubbing salt in the wound. ]
It didn't cross my mind that it would not work.
no subject
I was not prepared for it. My reaction to you was automatic and unintentional.
[Part habit, part uncertainty… is he really explaining himself well? It's so difficult; he feels like he's standing at the base of a sheer cliff, unready to climb.]
It wasn't your fault. And it does not mean that we are not compatible, but… it's possible there are still risks to us attempting to Sync. An emotional toll.
[Is Sasuke even aware of the all-encompassing, debilitating, paralzying effect he has on his older brother? No. Likely not. He's buried that piece of himself beneath a lifetime of guilt. He'd severed their relationship so long ago, expecting to never get it back.]
I would try it with you again, under more deliberate circumstances. If that is something you'd want.
no subject
It isn't lost on him that it had taken death, resurrection, and Sasuke's unbridled determination to get any kind of truth from his brother. Yet here, all it had taken was a text message. But more than the offer of Synchrony and all that comes with it are the words It wasn't your fault.
It takes him a good thirty minutes to reel himself back and return to the conversation. ]
I remember. You said the Bond was similar. Mastering that technique must have been easy for a shinobi of your caliber.
I would try again.
I believe it should work.
no subject
He doesn't want to acknowledge the compliment. It feels so wrong, and so misplaced, a matured pantomime of Sasuke as a child crowing over his brother's skill as a shinobi. And how does it compare now, suspecting Sasuke has likely surpassed his ability altogether? No, almost certainly he has. His own physical condition here would see to that difference now.]
It wasn't so simple as that.
In any case… I am grateful for your willingness to attempt it again.
[That's all he can think to say, an appreciation for Sasuke's confidence like a bright, blazing beacon in the dark.
He can only hope he is right.]
no subject
I'll keep in touch.