[The reaction is fairly expected, although he had no idea what its exact shape might be, so rarely have they ever discussed anything of a personal nature. Hell had propped open that door; still they hadn't fully walked through it. He finds himself studying Kisame's expression to memorize it exactly. Neither of them are so open - he recognizes that he may never see it again quite so plain on the other man's face.
Even that laughter sounds unnatural, or at least nothing he's heard with any frequency in their long years together, a representation of the strangeness now between them. Not distance - that had always existed by necessity - but almost a recognition of it instead. An acknowledgement of everything hidden.
The question causes Itachi's brows to furrow, but the confusion is sidetracked immediately by the sight of his partner's arm. That vivid, violent scar takes all of his attention. Betrayal.
So Kisame had continued to suffer in that dimension.]
… Was that what he said? [A mild, quiet tone.] It's complicated, but he requested an official status. He also understands that it is not permanent.
[Something made clear to Stiles before he'd even agreed to such an absurd, uncharacteristic, painfully tender decision.]
[ An official status, eh? As he mechanically sets his cloak aside, Kisame thinks back to his meeting with Stiles, picking through the memory for details he may have dismissed. He recalls that one of the teenager's first questions concerned the exact nature of his partnership with Itachi. Of course, Kisame had declined to answer; even if that were something easily explained, he wouldn't share it with a stranger. Now, he wonders if there was more to Stiles' question than mere nosiness.
"How" and "why" continue to swim in Kisame's mind, joined now by questions about the relationship's impermanence. He voices none of them. This territory is too unfamiliar, and he is acutely aware of how much Itachi can hide. Better to make his own observations first — and this plan, hastily constructed as it is, serves to help him regain his composure. ]
Ah, this?
[ It could be nothing else, yet Kisame still glances down at the scar. He has done so often since that young woman carved it. His injuries usually heal cleaner, leaving only faint traces behind. Perhaps the vividness of those proclaiming his sins was some trick of Hell. ]
I received it a few weeks ago. Strange that it's so clear, don't you think?
[ As he looks back to his partner, his eyes fall briefly on Itachi's sternum. Does Itachi still bear scars of torture…? And then, as he brings his gaze up, he catches a glint of something half-hidden by Itachi's collar. It is a gem; it must be. But its location reminds Kisame of his partner's necklace, and the fingers of his left hand twitch very slightly.
There's no way to ask about the necklace itself without raising suspicion. So instead, ]
[It's no surprise that he finds nothing easily read in the other man's outward demeanor and spoken words. They have both learned, perhaps in different ways, to mask true thoughts and intentions. It is more than a necessity given their profession. In most cases, it means survival. Yet in this moment Itachi is struck by the realization that he wishes his partner were somewhat more transparent to him now than normally—that it was easier to know Kisame's opinion on Stiles, and the vulnerable admission he has surrendered in an uncharacteristic move. If it means anything to the other man.
But the want is impossible. Truthfully, he doesn't even know what inspires it, outside the fact that they've operated for so long as a unit, making decisions and adjusting to outside variables together. It feels strange, wrong, to have gone on without Kisame. What did it change between them? What was changing, or had already altered past the point of recognition?]
… Unusual scars seem common in that dimension. [He feels that gaze, doesn't even need to confirm where it's pointed, inclining his head slightly. A hand reaches to tug down the collar with one slender finger and bare the small, dime-sized purple crystal, set in a bare throat. No necklace in sight.] Yes, it is. Amethyst.
[And his own look sharpens, dark eyes weighing heavy.]
Where is yours? Which of the four cardinal gems were you given?
[ Before now, Kisame has had no way of knowing if the necklace he carries is really Itachi's. It could have been a mere fabrication created in Hell. His partner's bare throat confirms that his (foolish, sentimental, potentially dangerous) decision to treat the necklace as genuine wasn't wrong. That ought to be reassuring, yet it presents a new complication: now that he knows the necklace is Itachi's, how does he go about returning it? Should he roll up his arm warmer and hand it over, revealing that he has worn it all this time? Should he fabricate a lie and pretend to retrieve it from another room? But if he does that, how should he explain its presence when only the items on his person came with him from Hell?
Yet again, Kisame finds himself at a loss. And yet again, his distraction causes a slight delay in his response as his gaze lingers on Itachi's throat. It's not so blatant that a stranger would pick up on it. But between the two of them, it is a hesitation where there should be none; a stumbling block in what should be the natural flow of conversation. When did he allow himself to start caring this much? Why does it matter what Itachi might think of the necklace?
Some part of him whispers, "Itachi is dead." Another part counters, "But not here." ]
… A sapphire, [ he says, bringing his eyes back up to meet Itachi's. ] It's on my lower back, so it's a bit harder to see.
[ Kisame has craned his neck around to check in a mirror, of course, but that's hardly a convenient way to inspect it. ]
[Predictably, that hesitation is noticed: they can both be read in their silences, years of practice aiding the art of subtle communication. They are not men of many genuine words. Kisame may speak more, but what he says is not often what he means, a passive speaking-past the point that matters, sidestepping the root of truth in order to stand on its outskirts and gather more information. It's a tactic that has served them well before. A strategy that gives nothing of his real mind away; one that makes it difficult, now, to know what he's thinking.
Intuiting these smaller details—the hesitations—are perhaps one of the only ways he can understand Kisame. It feels like reaching both hands into deep, brackish water, searching for slippery hints to grasp hold and pull out. So he always pays attention.]
I see. Sapphire suits you. Its innate water alignment may bolster your own natural abilities.
[He doesn't ask to be shown the gem. And whatever Kisame may be withholding, whether his own personal thoughts about their situation or something else, he will not corner him or make him confess. Better to leave it alone. Itachi's eyes drift to the ground, body shifting slightly away as his hips lean against the counter.]
Have you learned of Synchrony, and how it is used here to generate Manna? It seems to be the primary energy source of this dimension.
[ They agree where water is concerned: it suits Kisame better than any other element. But the other part of Sapphire, the healing, strikes Kisame as laughably inappropriate. He's about as far from a medical-nin as it's possible to get. His talent lies in inflicting pain, not easing it. And while it is true that he can heal his own wounds using Samehada, the idea of healing some stranger's injuries is absurd.
Is Itachi's gem likewise both suitable and distinctly not? He can't immediately recall any details about Amethyst. An oversight on his part; he'll have to educate himself.
Itachi shifts then, his normally rigid posture seeming to relax a bit more as dark eyes turn away. Kisame remains as he is, seizing upon a moment to observe his partner without being watched in turn. Itachi looks … well, just as he does in Kisame's memory. Just as he has for years and years, save for the changes that come with age. Perhaps Kisame should be grateful he never saw Itachi's body: there is no image of a cold, motionless corpse to which he can compare Itachi's living, breathing form. ]
I've heard about it.
[ "Heard," though not yet experienced. And then Kisame hesitates once again, catching himself before he asks, "How has that been going…?" His immediate assumption is that Itachi would be struggling with the process — but Itachi is "involved." Although questions still swim in Kisame's mind concerning that 'involvement,' he presumes it involves Synchrony. Wouldn't that be most efficient?
So rather than asking a question, Kisame merely comments, ]
It seems inconvenient.
[ It sounds half-distracted even to his own ears. Kisame presses his lips together as annoyance and frustration rise. Why is this so difficult? Itachi is his partner; talking to him ought to be easy. So why is he so uncertain? Why is he letting his emotions interfere?
Fueled by irritation with himself, Kisame's caution wavers. If this were a fight, he might switch to some powerful, potentially reckless attack. Here, standing with his dead partner in another dimension, Kisame admits, ]
I have something of yours. I wasn't sure if it was genuine, but … you're missing your necklace, right?
[Heard. He can correctly infer that this means Kisame hasn't yet experienced the emotional link of Synchrony. No large shock, as he imagines he would be in quite the same situation as his partner without the past history of the Bond in Aefenglom—firsthand exposure to the discomfort of vulnerability, the linking between two people bared to their most honest bone. In fact, he is certain the Bond is the real reason that he and Stiles have come to where they are now, messily intertwined.
What will it be like for Kisame? How will it feel for his partner, previously as closed off and emotionally withdrawn as he once vowed to remain forever? An impulse tugs at Itachi, the desire to offer Syncing; it's a practical need, after all, and one Kisame will need to learn for the sake of survival. Yet he is also self-aware enough to comprehend his own selfishness, having leaned on tactics such as the Bond and Synchrony to read emotional states, using that form of connection as a means of communication that supersedes the necessity of actual words. A useful tool. It was much easier to know what Stiles was thinking and feeling when they were Bonded than it is now, unless they are Synced.
What will Kisame be feeling? Could he access that side of him, for the first time in their years-long partnership?
The possibility is sidelined immediately by what is said next. Itachi blinks, expression almost owlish in its confusion, head turning to stare hard at the other man.]
… Yes, I am. [He'd assumed the necklace was lost somewhere in the leaps between dimensions. The piece of jewelry isn't necessarily a sentimental or meaningful item, except perhaps the fact that it is one of the few things he's ever purchased for himself on a whim with no practical reason to possess it. He had simply liked it.] You have it?
[More significantly, Kisame kept it. The admission is vaguely paralyzing. It may be too much to believe that he thought they would cross paths again, so he could return the necklace to him, when there's truly no promise it would ever happen, particularly knowing his own fate. An unusual self-consciousness touches Itachi; his eyes lower to his own feet, and he's silent for a long moment. Should he ask where Kisame found it? What would he say?]
I assumed it was gone. [A dark gaze lifts, but slowly.] Where is it?
[ In another situation, Kisame might chuckle at his partner's clear confusion. It is a rare sight, after all. As it is, his brief flicker of amusement shows itself in a quick, thin smile that vanishes as soon as Itachi's gaze drops. Then Itachi is silent, and Kisame watches and waits.
Years ago, Kisame was forced to leap off a cliff while fleeing from a squad of Konoha's Anbu. He had no idea what lay at the bottom, nor could he be sure if he would survive the fall. He feels rather like that now: as though he's stepped off a ledge and is plummeting toward some unknown fate. A bit dramatic, perhaps — but what good has ever come from admitting vulnerability? Kisame can think of only one time such a thing was for the best … and Itachi is not Madara.
"Where is it?" That's too direct a question to avoid, particularly when a lie could fall apart so easily. So Kisame raises his left wrist, then looks down at it, avoiding Itachi's gaze. (Is that cowardly of him? Perhaps. But for once, he doesn't want to meet those eyes.) He slides his right index finger beneath the band of his arm warmer and pulls the fabric up. And there, wrapped carefully around his wrist, is Itachi's necklace. ]
I found it sometime after you vanished. Lucky thing, eh?
[ It's an attempt to explain how he has it without touching on why. Will Itachi let him leave it at that…? He doesn't know, but he offers nothing more.
Kisame keeps his gaze on his work as he gently unfastens the clasp and unwinds the necklace from his wrist. His skin feels oddly bare without it. Ignoring that sensation, he finally looks up and holds the necklace out to his partner. ]
[A lucky, convenient thing to be sure. His gaze is measured, attempting to dissect the truer meaning of his partner's words - a second-sense telling him that there is more unspoken in the context of that explanation. But he cannot demand it. After all, concealing secrets is the heart of how they've operated for several years. It offers safety, a professional distance.
Yet some fissures have still developed, and looking at Kisame now, the urgency to know his partner's inner world is almost overwhelming. Especially as he comes to realize where Kisame has kept the necklace since they were last together.
Itachi stares, openly, at the chain looped around the other man's wrist. Is it there for security, so that it may not fall off or get lost? Wouldn't a pocket or bag have served the purpose? Endless questions race through his head unanswered. Part of him wonders whether Kisame won't lie, if he asked more directly.
Tentative fingers extend, accepting the necklace, allowing it to loop over his knuckles. The metal is warm against his skin. What would happen if he refused and insisted Kisame keep it - would he dispose of it, seeing the item as useless? Itachi has no need to possess the necklace now, but the thought that his partner might simply toss it into the trash holds any desire to give it back. He slides it into a pocket.]
... Thank you. [A brief, uneasy silence falls. Then he moves forward, hunting the kitchen and extended area for something to write on. He finds a pen and pad of paper on the counter. With a quick scrawl, an address is jotted down.] This is where I am currently staying, should you need to find me. It is not too far from here.
[ In the space of that uneasy silence, Kisame wonders if he ought to speak. But what would he say? Brushing Itachi's gratitude aside is an option, but that would be disingenuous even for him. He can't very well feign indifference, either; if he were indifferent, the necklace would still be in Hell. Some part of him — the reckless part — wants to offer an explanation. What would happen then? What would his cold partner think if Kisame were to admit that he had clung to the only piece of Itachi that remained?
The moment passes. Kisame keeps his useless sentimentalism to himself. The sensation of falling fades; in its place comes the dull, heavy weight of exhaustion. He tries not to let it show. He can rest later. ]
Thank you. I'll keep you informed of any interesting developments.
[ Those words feel strange to say. When was the last time he needed to 'keep Itachi informed' of anything? Not only is Itachi a genius, but they worked side-by-side for years. Even privacy was minimal, what with needing to watch each other for signs of treachery. There was no need for such updates when Itachi was right beside him.
But things have changed since then. Itachi died. Kisame has spent six months on his own or at Madara's right hand. Now Itachi is alive once more, living a second life in which he is "involved." And Kisame still has a mission to accomplish. A new world to create.
He releases a quiet breath. So, they'll reside in different places, and they'll find each other if needed. It could be far worse. ]
… I'm pleased that you're here as well, Itachi-san.
[ Words that skirt the truth: "I'm so thankful that you're alive." ]
[Kisame is not the only one who has noticed the implicit change. Were they still in Hell, he might have fallen easily to his partner’s side in living accommodations and regular company as before. The better to watch and monitor their surroundings. But there is no need now, in this world and its relative safety by comparison -- that, and he has already turned down Stiles’ offer to live together. How would it seem if he went to Kisame instead?
And the differences of time, environments, circumstances. Here, he is sick. He isn’t sure what would happen if Kisame discovered this; perhaps, as was the case while he was alive, nothing but quiet compliance. Yet he is no longer willing to put that burden on his partner if it isn’t strictly necessary. He can manage well enough on his own.
The comment stops him, head turning, attempting to gauge Kisame’s expression for its subtlest details. Whether or not he reaches some conclusion, the slight dip of his head reveals little.]
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no subject
Even that laughter sounds unnatural, or at least nothing he's heard with any frequency in their long years together, a representation of the strangeness now between them. Not distance - that had always existed by necessity - but almost a recognition of it instead. An acknowledgement of everything hidden.
The question causes Itachi's brows to furrow, but the confusion is sidetracked immediately by the sight of his partner's arm. That vivid, violent scar takes all of his attention. Betrayal.
So Kisame had continued to suffer in that dimension.]
… Was that what he said? [A mild, quiet tone.] It's complicated, but he requested an official status. He also understands that it is not permanent.
[Something made clear to Stiles before he'd even agreed to such an absurd, uncharacteristic, painfully tender decision.]
How recent is your injury?
no subject
"How" and "why" continue to swim in Kisame's mind, joined now by questions about the relationship's impermanence. He voices none of them. This territory is too unfamiliar, and he is acutely aware of how much Itachi can hide. Better to make his own observations first — and this plan, hastily constructed as it is, serves to help him regain his composure. ]
Ah, this?
[ It could be nothing else, yet Kisame still glances down at the scar. He has done so often since that young woman carved it. His injuries usually heal cleaner, leaving only faint traces behind. Perhaps the vividness of those proclaiming his sins was some trick of Hell. ]
I received it a few weeks ago. Strange that it's so clear, don't you think?
[ As he looks back to his partner, his eyes fall briefly on Itachi's sternum. Does Itachi still bear scars of torture…? And then, as he brings his gaze up, he catches a glint of something half-hidden by Itachi's collar. It is a gem; it must be. But its location reminds Kisame of his partner's necklace, and the fingers of his left hand twitch very slightly.
There's no way to ask about the necklace itself without raising suspicion. So instead, ]
Is that your gem, Itachi-san?
no subject
But the want is impossible. Truthfully, he doesn't even know what inspires it, outside the fact that they've operated for so long as a unit, making decisions and adjusting to outside variables together. It feels strange, wrong, to have gone on without Kisame. What did it change between them? What was changing, or had already altered past the point of recognition?]
… Unusual scars seem common in that dimension. [He feels that gaze, doesn't even need to confirm where it's pointed, inclining his head slightly. A hand reaches to tug down the collar with one slender finger and bare the small, dime-sized purple crystal, set in a bare throat. No necklace in sight.] Yes, it is. Amethyst.
[And his own look sharpens, dark eyes weighing heavy.]
Where is yours? Which of the four cardinal gems were you given?
no subject
Yet again, Kisame finds himself at a loss. And yet again, his distraction causes a slight delay in his response as his gaze lingers on Itachi's throat. It's not so blatant that a stranger would pick up on it. But between the two of them, it is a hesitation where there should be none; a stumbling block in what should be the natural flow of conversation. When did he allow himself to start caring this much? Why does it matter what Itachi might think of the necklace?
Some part of him whispers, "Itachi is dead." Another part counters, "But not here." ]
… A sapphire, [ he says, bringing his eyes back up to meet Itachi's. ] It's on my lower back, so it's a bit harder to see.
[ Kisame has craned his neck around to check in a mirror, of course, but that's hardly a convenient way to inspect it. ]
no subject
Intuiting these smaller details—the hesitations—are perhaps one of the only ways he can understand Kisame. It feels like reaching both hands into deep, brackish water, searching for slippery hints to grasp hold and pull out. So he always pays attention.]
I see. Sapphire suits you. Its innate water alignment may bolster your own natural abilities.
[He doesn't ask to be shown the gem. And whatever Kisame may be withholding, whether his own personal thoughts about their situation or something else, he will not corner him or make him confess. Better to leave it alone. Itachi's eyes drift to the ground, body shifting slightly away as his hips lean against the counter.]
Have you learned of Synchrony, and how it is used here to generate Manna? It seems to be the primary energy source of this dimension.
no subject
Is Itachi's gem likewise both suitable and distinctly not? He can't immediately recall any details about Amethyst. An oversight on his part; he'll have to educate himself.
Itachi shifts then, his normally rigid posture seeming to relax a bit more as dark eyes turn away. Kisame remains as he is, seizing upon a moment to observe his partner without being watched in turn. Itachi looks … well, just as he does in Kisame's memory. Just as he has for years and years, save for the changes that come with age. Perhaps Kisame should be grateful he never saw Itachi's body: there is no image of a cold, motionless corpse to which he can compare Itachi's living, breathing form. ]
I've heard about it.
[ "Heard," though not yet experienced. And then Kisame hesitates once again, catching himself before he asks, "How has that been going…?" His immediate assumption is that Itachi would be struggling with the process — but Itachi is "involved." Although questions still swim in Kisame's mind concerning that 'involvement,' he presumes it involves Synchrony. Wouldn't that be most efficient?
So rather than asking a question, Kisame merely comments, ]
It seems inconvenient.
[ It sounds half-distracted even to his own ears. Kisame presses his lips together as annoyance and frustration rise. Why is this so difficult? Itachi is his partner; talking to him ought to be easy. So why is he so uncertain? Why is he letting his emotions interfere?
Fueled by irritation with himself, Kisame's caution wavers. If this were a fight, he might switch to some powerful, potentially reckless attack. Here, standing with his dead partner in another dimension, Kisame admits, ]
I have something of yours. I wasn't sure if it was genuine, but … you're missing your necklace, right?
no subject
What will it be like for Kisame? How will it feel for his partner, previously as closed off and emotionally withdrawn as he once vowed to remain forever? An impulse tugs at Itachi, the desire to offer Syncing; it's a practical need, after all, and one Kisame will need to learn for the sake of survival. Yet he is also self-aware enough to comprehend his own selfishness, having leaned on tactics such as the Bond and Synchrony to read emotional states, using that form of connection as a means of communication that supersedes the necessity of actual words. A useful tool. It was much easier to know what Stiles was thinking and feeling when they were Bonded than it is now, unless they are Synced.
What will Kisame be feeling? Could he access that side of him, for the first time in their years-long partnership?
The possibility is sidelined immediately by what is said next. Itachi blinks, expression almost owlish in its confusion, head turning to stare hard at the other man.]
… Yes, I am. [He'd assumed the necklace was lost somewhere in the leaps between dimensions. The piece of jewelry isn't necessarily a sentimental or meaningful item, except perhaps the fact that it is one of the few things he's ever purchased for himself on a whim with no practical reason to possess it. He had simply liked it.] You have it?
[More significantly, Kisame kept it. The admission is vaguely paralyzing. It may be too much to believe that he thought they would cross paths again, so he could return the necklace to him, when there's truly no promise it would ever happen, particularly knowing his own fate. An unusual self-consciousness touches Itachi; his eyes lower to his own feet, and he's silent for a long moment. Should he ask where Kisame found it? What would he say?]
I assumed it was gone. [A dark gaze lifts, but slowly.] Where is it?
no subject
Years ago, Kisame was forced to leap off a cliff while fleeing from a squad of Konoha's Anbu. He had no idea what lay at the bottom, nor could he be sure if he would survive the fall. He feels rather like that now: as though he's stepped off a ledge and is plummeting toward some unknown fate. A bit dramatic, perhaps — but what good has ever come from admitting vulnerability? Kisame can think of only one time such a thing was for the best … and Itachi is not Madara.
"Where is it?" That's too direct a question to avoid, particularly when a lie could fall apart so easily. So Kisame raises his left wrist, then looks down at it, avoiding Itachi's gaze. (Is that cowardly of him? Perhaps. But for once, he doesn't want to meet those eyes.) He slides his right index finger beneath the band of his arm warmer and pulls the fabric up. And there, wrapped carefully around his wrist, is Itachi's necklace. ]
I found it sometime after you vanished. Lucky thing, eh?
[ It's an attempt to explain how he has it without touching on why. Will Itachi let him leave it at that…? He doesn't know, but he offers nothing more.
Kisame keeps his gaze on his work as he gently unfastens the clasp and unwinds the necklace from his wrist. His skin feels oddly bare without it. Ignoring that sensation, he finally looks up and holds the necklace out to his partner. ]
no subject
Yet some fissures have still developed, and looking at Kisame now, the urgency to know his partner's inner world is almost overwhelming. Especially as he comes to realize where Kisame has kept the necklace since they were last together.
Itachi stares, openly, at the chain looped around the other man's wrist. Is it there for security, so that it may not fall off or get lost? Wouldn't a pocket or bag have served the purpose? Endless questions race through his head unanswered. Part of him wonders whether Kisame won't lie, if he asked more directly.
Tentative fingers extend, accepting the necklace, allowing it to loop over his knuckles. The metal is warm against his skin. What would happen if he refused and insisted Kisame keep it - would he dispose of it, seeing the item as useless? Itachi has no need to possess the necklace now, but the thought that his partner might simply toss it into the trash holds any desire to give it back. He slides it into a pocket.]
... Thank you. [A brief, uneasy silence falls. Then he moves forward, hunting the kitchen and extended area for something to write on. He finds a pen and pad of paper on the counter. With a quick scrawl, an address is jotted down.] This is where I am currently staying, should you need to find me. It is not too far from here.
no subject
The moment passes. Kisame keeps his useless sentimentalism to himself. The sensation of falling fades; in its place comes the dull, heavy weight of exhaustion. He tries not to let it show. He can rest later. ]
Thank you. I'll keep you informed of any interesting developments.
[ Those words feel strange to say. When was the last time he needed to 'keep Itachi informed' of anything? Not only is Itachi a genius, but they worked side-by-side for years. Even privacy was minimal, what with needing to watch each other for signs of treachery. There was no need for such updates when Itachi was right beside him.
But things have changed since then. Itachi died. Kisame has spent six months on his own or at Madara's right hand. Now Itachi is alive once more, living a second life in which he is "involved." And Kisame still has a mission to accomplish. A new world to create.
He releases a quiet breath. So, they'll reside in different places, and they'll find each other if needed. It could be far worse. ]
… I'm pleased that you're here as well, Itachi-san.
[ Words that skirt the truth: "I'm so thankful that you're alive." ]
no subject
And the differences of time, environments, circumstances. Here, he is sick. He isn’t sure what would happen if Kisame discovered this; perhaps, as was the case while he was alive, nothing but quiet compliance. Yet he is no longer willing to put that burden on his partner if it isn’t strictly necessary. He can manage well enough on his own.
The comment stops him, head turning, attempting to gauge Kisame’s expression for its subtlest details. Whether or not he reaches some conclusion, the slight dip of his head reveals little.]
Likewise.
[In the lingering silence, he turns to leave.]